Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Mean Dream

It sucks when you dream something, AND you know your capable of doing it. One of the things that sucks about being a huge teddy bear...key words being 'huge' and 'bear.' I blame the subject matter after watching 'Prison Break' on TV last night (after Jonathan was in bed, of course.)

It was storming outside, Little Blue was either asleep or not in the dream at all. Pink and I were in the basement, watching TV and keeping a eye on the storm. Suddenly we hear the front door open and someone start coming down the stairs. My mind starts racing...not only is this an intruder, but he knows the lay of the house AND where we'd be.

Man comes down wearing a prison uniform, saying something like "You F'd w/ me in Prison Blue, and now you're going to get it." Words are exchanged, mostly heated, and eventually Pink goes upstairs to the bedroom so I'm alone w/ Mr. Inmate. We talk more, both keeping our distances, and somehow we come to an agreement. All is fine, apparently there was something I could do for him that would make ammends, so he dashes on out the door. (this must have been the 'teddy' part of the dream)

Flash forward a hair, and I'm working my way upstairs. I enter the bedroom, and instead of one bed, there are 3 or 4 single beds. This must have been expected, as I didn't think it odd at the time. What was odd was that there were two beds with the obvious shapes of people being under the covers. One I knew was my wife, the other I didn't know.

Assuming I knew which one was my wife, I lifted the sheets on the other one. Another prison inmate, this one armed with a flat razor blade. We both caught each other by surprise, but I reacted faster, grabbing his right arm at the wrist as he flicked the blade open. I pinned his other arm against his body with my right arm, my weight keeping it firmly in place.

I looked over at Pink, her head sticking out of the top of the sheets. I nodded my head over to the phone and said in a plain, straight, voice, "Would you please dial 911 form me?"

Pink nodded, began to dash over to the phone and began to say something to the effect of offering some tips on how not to injure myself while keeping Mr. Inmate#2 at bay. I remember her saying something like "To keep him pinned, you need too..."

I didn't cut her off by saying some cute four letter words which would have been the obvious thing for me to do.

I didn't say anything, but I know my face showed "I'll whatever the F I have to do to keep us safe" in pure unbridled malice. I turned back to the buddy Inmate, and threw my forehead into his nose. Cartilage broke, like the sound of steping on a big cricket, and blood flew everywhere. Next, my left hand simply crawled up the mans hand so that his fist was in mine. Apparently the gift of lumbering Little Blue arounnd and playing percussion for half of my life gave me the power to simply squeeze my left hand. The next thing all three of us heard was the crumpling of bone, the razor blade falling to the floor, and Mr. Inmate#2 wailing his head off. (this apparently was the huge and the bear portion of the dream).

I woke up with the sound of the alarm, my mind reminding me of where I really was and I had my thoughts collected by the time Pink hit the snooze.

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